Q: I have been ‘chatting’ to a guy online now for a few weeks and he wants to meet up in real life. I would really like to meet up too as he seems really nice but I am a bit uneasy about meeting someone new for the first time. Could you please give me some practical advice on arranging our first ‘date’? Thanks.

A: Meeting someone new for the first time can be very daunting in any situation, especially in today’s world when the papers seem to be full of crime and other horror stories. You are right to feel anxious as people can be whoever they want to be when they are ‘online’ and all may not be as it seems, for these reasons while you are chatting online never give out your telephone number, last name or address until you know who you are chatting to. When YOU feel ready to meet this man the please stick to the following safety tips, which are applicable for any first date, and will hopefully make you feel a bit less nervous and a bit more secure;

1. Always tell someone where you are going and who you are going to meet.

2. Always meet in a public place, like a bar or restaurant.

3. Ideally take a friend (or two). They can always sit at the next table but will still be close at hand if needed. If this guy really cares about you he will not mind you bringing someone else along if it means he gets to meet you.

4. Never invite anyone to your own home or go to their home until you are very sure you can trust them.

5. If you do have to go alone arrange for a friend to pick you up at a pre-arranged time. If this is not possible get a friend to phone you at a pre-arranged time to check all is well.

6. Take a mobile phone with you. If you haven’t got your own borrow one. Make sure it is fully charged and you have plenty of credit and also make sure you have an “emergency fund” of money with you just in case.

I’m sorry if these tips seem a bit over the top, but you can never be too careful. Good luck with the relationship, and let me know how it goes!

When a website is 100% free, you may find that all people joining the site are genuine or are after a long term, meaningful relationship. 

Websites that are free to join, and then charge to contact other members is a good indication that people who are already members are  serious about meeting someone. In this case, you can be assured that if someone contacts you, they are genuinely looking for a partner. 

Website where you pay to join upfront are usually frequented by professionals or sometimes specialist agencies - such are Russian brides or Thai brides.

 

Do...... 1. Be Honest - You would want people to be honest with you and prevent disappointment. 2. Tell friends and family where you are going if you are meeting someone you meet on-line. 3. Meet public places until you get to know them 4. Always be careful and use your common sense. 5. Take precautions 6. Speak to the person on the phone first before you initial meeting. Don't....... 1. Meet secretly 2. Meet in a secluded area 3. Get into a car with someone you have only just met. 4. Lie on your profile. 5. Pretend to be someone you are not 6. Be pressured to do something you don't want to do 7. Agree to meet if you are unsure

Meeting the right person can feel like it's never going to happen, but once you've not known them it's like you've known them forever. My first long term relationship was far from good - he was possessive, arrogant, lazy, unemployed and always ill. He never actually hit me but it got to a point where I thought he was capable of it. I managed to leave that relationship behind me and came out it a shadow of my formal self. I never thought I'd meet anyone again and thought I'd be single the rest of my life. I started trying various Internet dating websites and met a few guys who where nice but not the one. Whenever I met someone I made sure that a number of people knew where I was going and also ensured it was in a public place for my own safety. You never can be too careful. Finally, I met prince charming through a dating website and we are due to marry in June this year. It just goes to prove that you can meet your true love on-line. You may have to kiss a few frogs first to find your prince, but he's it out there somewhere. Kate x

Police are trying to trace a man wanted for defrauding women from Bristol who he met on free dating websites [bbc news].

Officers said David Brice targets mature women who he befriends before persuading them to part with money, cars, laptops or mobile phones.

He has used the name Wayman in the past and has met women on sites including plentyoffish.com and smooch.com

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