Q:
My wife had an affair with my so called best friend while i was away at collage. Also when i returned she said that she did not feel loved.

Every time i tried to be romantic or friendly she kept pushing me away, then she says she loves me but only as a friend and she does not want me sexually.

Am i wasting my time staying with her or is there any way this marriage can work out and my wife becomes a real woman as she comes from a very strict Christian background. Please help

A:
This is a very hard question to answer as only your wife truly knows how she feels. Have you asked her if she wants to make your marriage work? It will only work if both of you want it to.

I take it that the fact that you are still together means that you have forgiven her affair? If this is the case then for your own sanity you need to forget about it too. You have made a decision to stay with your wife so you need to move on and stop raking up the past.

I assume that by wanting your wife to “become a real woman” you mean you want her to want you sexually?? I do not like how you have put this as there is more to a relationship than sex. If she does not want to make love to you then there is nothing you can do about that. You need to respect her Christian beliefs as they are a part of who she is. If you can’t live with out sex then you should be with someone else who can satisfy you.

There must have been a lot of love between you two at some point for you to get married. You need to talk to your wife and find out what you both want. Be honest with each other and only then you can move on. I hope you can both be happy in the future.

Q:

My wife had an affair with my so called best friend while i was away at collage. Also when i returned she said that she did not feel loved.

Every time i tried to be romantic or friendly she kept pushing me away, then she says she loves me but only as a friend and she does not want me sexually.

Am I wasting my time staying with her or is there any way this marriage can work out and my wife becomes a real woman as she comes from a very strict Christian background. Please help!

A:

This is a very hard question to answer as only your wife truly knows how she feels. Have you asked her if she wants to make your marriage work? It will only work if both of you want it to.

I take it that the fact that you are still together means that you have forgiven her affair? If this is the case then for your own sanity you need to forget about it too. You have made a decision to stay with your wife so you need to move on and stop raking up the past.

I assume that by wanting your wife to “become a real woman” you mean you want her to want you sexually?? I do not like how you have put this as there is more to a relationship than sex. If she does not want to make love to you then there is nothing you can do about that. You need to respect her Christian beliefs as they are a part of who she is. If you can’t live with out sex then you should be with someone else who can satisfy you.

There must have been a lot of love between you two at some point for you to get married. You need to talk to your wife and find out what you both want. Be honest with each other and only then you can move on. I hope you can both be happy in the future.